Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts with the label Academics

Exam anxiety

My exams begin in about thirty days and this wait is terrifying. As the day approaches closer, my heart starts beating faster in anticipation of my performance. It should be better than the last. All this studying and reading and almost breaking my back over late night writing has to yield good results. My confidence wobbles on some days not because I am afraid but because I am terribly nervous of myself. Even as I am writing this, I feel butterflies in my stomach. A good friend once told me that a little nervousness is good. It ensures that we remain alert and not be too confident of everything. Not sure if it's a good thing to be both nervous and confident at the same time, I would rather be confident. This newness is scary. There are new feelings every time I begin something new and different, oblivious of what it shall lead to. I suppose it happens with everyone. We are all cut from the same cloth. I keep telling myself that every new challenge is to be accepted with a knight...

Ruminations II

My brain is fried with information overload, discussions on varied topics from architecture to gender theories and my Civil Service Examination studies. I truly can't seem to handle this immense pressure. Today especially just feels so hectic and stressed. I was reading interviews of UPSC candidates and it made me realise what a great lot of hard work I've to put in. It's not easy. And, since I don't think I'm exceptionally brilliant, studying hard and with determination is the only go right now. I just feel too lost sometimes. There are distractions- yes, but these mostly seem to be the vague kind. I'm not someone to be easily influenced by material happiness or momentary pleasures of life. Yes, I do get affected a lot by failure- to perform, to fulfill expectations, to outdo myself. I'm that 'go getter' kind who also is scared of giving up midway and tends to have serious doubts about her own capabilities. But, I am also someone who never gives...