20 years of Swabhimaan!!!

1996- This is the year I most vividly remember from my childhood. I was eight years old and had started acquiring a new taste for literature and visual mediums then. This was the year I remember having seen Thoda sa Aasmaan that starred Deepti Naval. She was a big name then. My parents were huge fans of her cinematic work and TV was generously allowed to be explored by kids like me by parents back then. The end credit shot of a wooden door with a white lattice was permanently etched in my eyes. Years later whenever I saw latticed windows and doors I always thought of Deepti Naval standing in solitude and frozen in time. I also clearly recall watching Swabhimaan and loved Svetlana. Don't know if it was the unusual sound of the name or I was just smitten by Kittu Gidwani! I did not read Russian Literature until I was ten, so, Svetlana charmed me for a long while. I remember watching YUG based on India's Freedom Struggle and its catchy title track ringed in my ears for a long time, clear even today. I haven't heard the soundtrack in more than twenty years but it still seems so fresh in my mind. My mother let me watch a quality of programmes then along with playing outdoors in fresh air and reading, of course. 

I still see Neem Ka Ped visuals in front of my eyes, absolutely clear. Aparajita was based on women empowerment and my mum & me were regular viewers and if I must say, ardent followers. We did not have a Cable subscription in 1996 so DD National was our sole gateway to the outside world. Junoon had a haunting track and I remember the strong vocals of Vinod Rathod, I think, who sung the song. The huge haveli with a bloody font for the serial had me quite scared. I am sure the story was nothing what I would guess today. I don't even remember the names of characters or scenes except for the sound track. Apart from these serials I also watched Jungle Book of course, and a very captivating saturday morning serial on Jesus Christ back then. I think it was called Dayasagar. All I remember now is the calm white robes of Christ and the people who followed him as he walked through cities. Tonight while surfing on youtube, I landed upon a link to Sahil and Kumar Sanu's soothing vocals to Sahil chup chup rehta hain instantly triggered some switch in my brain. This tune and words have been hidden inside my mind all these years, and they naturally gave an easy way to tears. Something about that era, because it seems like such a bygone time in my life, is deeply nostalgic and gently warms the cockles of my heart whenever I come across memories from the 90's. It was a time spent with my mum alone because Dad was posted away in another city. How I missed him! I have the fondest memories of awaiting for Dad on friday nights, going to sleep knowing he would be there when I got up the next morning on saturday. He always bought me toys and books and laid them next to my head as I slept. I can't quite describe the joy seeing Dad home gave me more than those presents. He took me on our Bajaj Scooter rides, we explored the city and talked a lot. He always had something new for me then as he does now. How little has he changed over the years! I still feel like a little kid before him. 

Coming back to twenty years of some glorious Television programmes that nurtured my childhood, I feel so amused at my own memory at times. If I hear a tune from those years especially the ones when mum & me were alone, I remember my younger self but can't recollect my Mum. Is it strange or what to not remember how my mother looked back then? Maybe because she still looks the same after all these years! Her photographs from back in the 90's show her with a cute shoulder length Bob cut hair style always kept open and her slim figure embracing my skinny self laughing together is a priceless memory. I was always so in awe of my mother and her elder sisters who were the prettiest ladies I had known as a child. They were simple women with a grace I tried to emulate unsuccessfully as a kid. I still remember my mavashi's pink cotton silk saree with a delicate golden border that she carried with such panache with her hair loosely tied hanging down her waist. Her gentle laughter that was her aura always had me transfixed. She visited us quite regularly throughout the week accompanied by her husband, my uncle, the most jovial person I've known and helped me with my craft projects. I still remember as if it's happening right in front of me, the night she arrived and helped make a bullock cart for my Craft assignment in school. She was the craftiest and most creative person I knew and for a child she was a wonderful role model. I wished to be like her when I grew up. Her kindness and warmth has woven a tight veil over my life. Such beautiful memories from those simple days!

What a lovely time to have spent as a kid! I am sure each generation has its own but 90's India was a definite magical place that holds truckload of memoirs as also a connection to the past. Probably ours was the generation who saw these changes that occurred with liberalisation with a very keen eye as kids and hence felt an immediate impact of those times, pre and post liberalisation so well. I am witness to the numerous lifestyle products that were suddenly available to everyone. Of course, they were pricey and hence quite out of reach of even middle class people but the glitter these things bought with them was magnanimous. Soft drinks like Coke and Pepsi had big musical adverts playing on TV apart from the regular simple tunes for Frooti, Rin, Lajjat Papad, Camlin and Nataraj Pencils. I still remember the awed expression I carried every time I watched adverts that sold western products in Indian markets. Television was such a glorious companion then. My love for visual media largely stemmed from watching the grandeur of Swabhimaan and the likes. I don't think I ever got influenced by TV again in the same scale as I did with DD. Then, we moved to Mumbai and the sweet connection with limited hours of TV came to an end as Cable TV entered in our lives with 50 plus channels then in 1997. I wish to relive that one year, 1996 as it was, again in all glory today. If I could, I most definitely would become younger again and enjoy Wednesday nights watching Chitrahaar with my mother, lying in bed and falling asleep midway during the songs. This is my most precious memory and I wish it never dies, even if it means that I relive it again and again only in my dreams.